People · Relationships · Religion

My conversation with Jesus – Part 3 (Life Difficulties and The Heroine’s/Hero’s Journey)

Me: What are heartaches and hardships for? Why do we incarnate to experience those?

Jesus: We don’t wanna live in theories – we all know theories are only possible because of practice. Theories can also only expand because of practice. The Universe is not a static one – it’s alive, it evolves. Physical reality is important because it makes it possible to bring ideas to physical forms, it’s a place where feelings and thoughts turn into physical manifestations and where choices have real life consequences. We can see how action and reaction are related more clearly. This makes us learn more.

Heartaches and hardships are a result of what doesn’t align with the Universal truths. They’re manifestations of what we are thinking, feeling and doing that is just simply wrong in the logic of the Divine – those which do not uphold and expand Life.

Difficulties give us opportunities to transcend our limited perspective – they point us in the right direction. They point us to the Light – to Source. Our challenge in the physical form is to transcend all that limits us and find our way back to Source. It’s easier said than done, definitely – and that’s the point. Without the difficulties we won’t expand so much.

It’s as though each of us is thrown into a maze and we have to use everything we’ve got to find our way. Our angels and spirit guides are there to guide us through our journey – couching us on where to turn, leap, duck, crawl, walk, run – and when to stand or sit still. Obstacles are faced and “enemies” appear – which could either break us or make us into the Super Heroine/Hero we’re meant to be. If you fail the maze and hit “Game Over” – you could always repeat it – But who wants to repeat the same game? It only makes sense to do it once and for all and move on to the new one. *winks

That’s the simplest way I could describe it. No wonder why humans are enamored by super heroine/hero stories –  because they accurately describe what each is going through and who can each become by accepting her/his own heroine’s/hero’s journey.

People · Relationships · Religion · Self

My conversation with Jesus – Part 2 (Redemption and Life Purpose)

Me: Let’s talk about mission…life purpose. Is it true that you’re the Son of God (therefore, a God, too) sent by God to redeem humanity of their sins?

Jesus: Like I’ve told you, religions like to craft stories based on their political agenda and the consciousness level of the time. Probably most of the time the intentions are good – but the consciousness of the humans are limited so the stories can be backward and disempowering in many ways.

Likewise, like I’ve told you, nobody can “save” anybody else but themselves and their direct, indestructible connection with Source (or God as many would like to call it). I can’t “save” anybody else but myself like any human – and I was a human. I incarnated on Earth. My intention (and the Source’s intention, too) was to set up an example of how to carry your cross (physical existence), go through life and transcend (resurrect, ascend) from it as a more expanded Spirit.

I was the “Son of God” in some religious’ people words – like any human. Each of you came from Source, therefore you’re all “sons and daughters of God”.

What I can contribute to this “life purpose discussion” based on my experiences is this: Before incarnating on Earth, each Spirit creates a plan and a purpose behind it – on what kind of expansion is desired/needed. Once the Spirit incarnates on a physical existence and becomes a human, she/he also comes with her/his own mind and freewill and the purpose that has been decided previously can still change – and it’s totally fine and normal. Real situations are experienced and lessons are learned when the Spirit is in the physical form – therefore it’s only logical to have a change of mind and plans.

Your “life purpose” can have twists and turns like your life path – the two are inseparable. Your life purpose is never final until you’ve  been sentenced to die – and you accept it.

Just look into the story of my life, for instance, there were many points going to my crucifixion where I could’ve resisted and not accepted what would happen next – and doing that would be totally fine to Source, I could change my mind. I knew I was gonna be betrayed, mocked, shamed, persecuted and sentenced to a horrible death. I knew what’s gonna happen next because I had a direct connection to Source and I chose to never lose it. Each step of the way Source would tell me what could happen next, and since I had freewill I was also given the option whether to accept it or not. I co-created my life path and each step of the way, I co-decided what my life purpose was.

Looking from outside, it would all seem tragic and scary, but when living from the inside-out, each choice you make and the consequences that come with it cleanse you and expand you – and having this kind of clarity makes the journey easier to bear. When your “why” is crystal clear to you, the “what” and “how” become secondary. Life still won’t be all sunshine and butterflies but you’ll always see the horizon – and this will bring you so much peace and comfort.

I see life purpose as something that brings meaning to everything you do and all the ways that you ache to expand. It’s something that grounds you – connects you to Source and manifestations of Life. Life purpose is something that fills you – that nourishes you and the life around you. You can never make a mistake in identifying and pursuing a life purpose.

Your life purpose is never final until you’re dying and you completely accept your impending physical death – which symbolizes the end of your life journey (for that particular cycle).

(to be continued…)

Activities · History · People · Relationships · Religion · Self

My conversation with Jesus – Part 1 (The Cross, Life on Earth and Religions)

Without planning it, I found myself sitting inside a Catholic Church at 5 pm yesterday. There were only about five of us inside. The space was the typical Church – it was huge – like it could fit 200-300 people, the ceiling was high, the doors were all open and birds flew around. I sat just face-to-face with the altar – the crucifixion in the center.

I just focused on Jesus in the cross. Intuitively – I asked him my nagging question:

Me: Why are you there? Why are you hanging in that cross? Why did you decide to let that happen?

Jesus: It’s true. I could have not let this happen to me. I could have argued against it, I could have revolted against it or I could simply have run away. But I didn’t. I let the events unfold. I let it happen. Why? Because logic was not what was called for at that time. I knew the only way I could’ve made a mark was by getting crucified without a struggle. If I simply relied on logic and my words I would’ve been able to make my point.

Me: And what was your point?

Jesus: Look, each human goes through similar events. Of course not everyone can (and should) go through exactly what I’ve been through – be crucified or be held on the spotlight (for better or worse – like the famous leaders before and after me). But the mere instance of incarnating into Earth in a physical form – that’s already a crucifixion in itself.

Each of you has been crucified in a way to your physical form and your physical environment – with all your needs, weaknesses and impulses. You’re crucified to time and space – you cannot be everywhere at the same time, you get born and you have to die.

My carrying of my cross and being crucified on it afterwards is just a blatant depiction of what each human goes through – you carry your physical existence like a cross because of course, everybody knows in the Universe that it’s not easy to live on Earth. It’s heavy – even heavier and bigger than you, and walking with it is needless to say, a life and death struggle. Likewise, you’re the only one who can carry it. Some may carry it for you for a time – but this defeats the purpose so you’ll eventually have to carry it again yourself – for the rest of your journey. Others will walk with you and comfort you – and this will help you make it through.

Your cross – your physical existence – is your cross and also your salvation. After all has been done, you’ll resurrect and ascend again and be a part of Spirit/Source which you all came from…then eventually when you’re ready, you’ll plan your next reincarnation.

What exactly is the highlight of my story – and what Christianity likes to highlight as well? My Resurrection. My Ascension. The fact that I rose from the dead and lived forever. Human history never forgets this truth – that life on Earth is temporary. This truth may have been twisted and used in many disempowering ways by some but if you dig into it – you’ll still see its purity. This truth has been preserved because it has helped humanity in making through physical existence.

Forget about being crucified for humanity’s sins – nobody can save anybody else but herself/himself and her/his personal connection to Source. I didn’t save – nor intend to save – anybody else but myself. Going through the way of your life’s cross and your own crucifixion was what I wanted to show, ’cause I knew that’s the path to resurrection, ascension and further expansion.

Each religion creates its own version of a story because it has its own intentions and political agenda. It doesn’t mean religions are useless or just plain destructive – it just means that they are a reflection of the current times. They have to evolve, too. People turn away from religions once they no longer resonate with their expansion. Therefore as humanity evolves and reaches a higher vibration, religions have to evolve, too.

If there are things that turn you off in your religion – then simply don’t accept them. Just like in any situation, use your own discernment and ability to think critically. Source has equipped you with your own mind and freewill – use them. Don’t turn your back against religion altogether simply because you don’t agree with some things about it – you might miss many important lessons it can offer you.

(to be continued…)

Activities · Self · Tarot Readings

I’ve got company ❤

I just got my Archangel Oracle deck! I’ve ordered this online and I’ve been waiting for weeks.  The timing of its arrival cannot be more perfect!

I am a self-taught tarot reader. I’ve been using the same deck for 8 years now which my father gave to me. I purchased another one a few years ago but couldn’t make myself read it – I just couldn’t connect with it. Tara (how I call my first deck) and I have been throught a lot and while we can still connect with each other – I have changed so much in these past 8 years so it just made sense to need a new deck.

At first I had doubts if I could make myself read the cards since they were made mainly for intuitive readings. After my first few readings though…it dawned on me that yes, I am ready for this. I’ve been diligently preparing myself for this with the full support of the Universe. I am able to prepare my mind faster and channel divine messages.

I’m excited to know more about the archangels and teach myself on how to channel their messages better. Above all, I, myself, am open and ŕeady for further transformation. Quoting the angels upon their arrival, “Let’s get the party started!”.

Activities · Tarot Readings

A new star project

After procrastinating for days, I have finally begun creating a blog for my personal interpretations on Lucy Cavendish’s Oracle Tarot deck – my first ever card deck which I have been using for 8 years now.

It consists of 62 cards. I don’t know how for the love of heavens I’m gonna finish writing about each card. It’s one thing to verbally interpret the cards – it’s another thing to write about them. But the inspiration came to me – and there is no way I’m gonna ignore it and shove it under the bed out of laziness. When I receive the inspiration to start something, I often, if not always follow through it up to its fruition.

Maybe there are people out there who are gonna benefit from what I write – like how I highly benefit from reading other people’s tarot card interpretations online. Who knows? Maybe I’m the only person on this planet who has actually worked with this deck this long – and my insights deserve a place on the world wide web.

Should I put a timeline to it? Probably. It doesn’t make sense to spend another 8 years finishing the blog. LOL. FYI I’ll only publish it when its officially complete. *crossfingers

Activities · People · Relationships · Self

The path of Forgiveness

One has to go through anger to reach forgiveness.

The Universe has been tirelessly pointing out to me that what I had to do to move forward was to forgive – LOL I didn’t even know I was so angry!

I used to be a runaway. I have developed a bad habit of running away from confrontations. I always believed that there’s no point to discuss, assert and speak up because people’s minds are closed off, anyway. I always thought going through messy times was just a waste.

I was given the chance (for the nth time!) to redeem myself and correct my unhealthy attitude and habit – and I took it. I willingly went through the tunnel of my frustrations, pain and anger towards people and myself. I squirmed, I rolled my eyes, I pushed back. I screamed in disgust and retaliation. It was horrible. I felt horrible – but only for a short while.

Despite it all, I let my higher self lead the way. I listened to my spirit guides, my angels – the all-ever-knowing Universe. I trusted them beyond my ability to trust (LOL swear) to guide me along. I stayed in the path. I sucked it up…and let it all go.

I have been proven wrong many, many times.

I didn’t even know that my lack of trust for practically almost everyone around me has been restricting my life – and my joy. I didn’t know that my anger was robbing me off with all the fun and love that wanted to get near me.

While it was not all sunshine and butterflies – many ugly truths reared its head out, too – what left an impact on me was the truth that the world was not against me – I was neither a victim nor a fucking bitch (for feeling so angry). Yeah, people fucked up and I was dragged into their mess and ego issues. People have hurt me and I felt betrayed quite a few times. Despite all of this, though, I have realized that nobody intentionally wanted to hurt me.

I am still learning how to forgive – I am not yet there. My steps are lighter, though – I feel more capable of moving forward now. Forgiveness really is key because anger causes our perspective to cloud. When we can’t see things as clear as possible we inevitably misinterpret every single thing – and this leads us to the path that is not right for us.

Forgiving is not about forcing ourselves to accept what happened – it’s about learning how to release it.

This is a skill and it takes time to learn (read: I’m still learning how to take the middle ground and neither fall into passive-aggressive silence nor half people with an ax) – but once we’ve mastered it, we would be able to magnify how we live our lives multiple times over. I used to to avoid the path of forgiveness and reroute to another, thinking I could get away without it – this time, I’m glad I didn’t.

Activities · Self

At the core of love is strength

Your heart can be soft and gentle, compassionate and forgiving – most of all because, at the core of your heart, at the core of love is strength.

Love is not passive. Love is not afraid. Love is built on courage. Love is founded on eternal truths.

Following your heart is not about rainbows and butterflies all the time. It’s a heroine’s journey. Prepare for soul-crushing battles and glorious triumphs alike.

Activities · Self

Choosing between the path of the ego and the path of your Spirit

Sometimes, we don’t get what we hope for and we think we must be cursed or undeserving. Other times, we get exactly what we hoped for – and maybe more – and  end up feeling damned, too, because then we’re faced with the dilemma of picking the right thing and of course we don’t want to make a mistake.

This can happen in any area of our life, but as a multipassionate person I am quite familiar with this scene. I didn’t know it could be THAT a big deal though until this thing happened to me…

I’ve been working on some career goals these past few months – really grinding it out like a modern careerist. The prizes I’ve been reaching for have always been beyond of my reach and were given to somebody else. I felt disappointed and hurt a few times. Until my calling pulled me in and revealed itself to me completely. But just when I said yes to it and said no to my modern careerist goals – the prizes I’ve been reaching out for dangled themselves in front of me, all tempting and sexy.

I will kid you not – it sucker punched me. I could still remember the day it happened – I felt sick, my tummy was so acidic that I had a hard time speaking and walking.

Then I asked the angels why they were confusing me. I was only able to hear their answer when I calmed down (and stopped being antagonistic) and my tummy felt normal again. This is what they told me:

We are not confusing you. Our stand is the same and we’ve always been consistent. You know very well what this means. All of these “hanging fruits” look tempting and delicious – but are they real? You know very well the answer to that. Tune into your heart and you can easily detect which is true and which isn’t.

BAM. That dawned on me like a waterfall.

I got rattled like a stupid mouse when I saw those prizes in front of me and for a while I forgot my truths. My ego got so excited and revved up with all the treats it can enjoy. But my spirit kept as still as a lotus in a pond. She didn’t even budge. When I checked on her again I got the straightforward answer she always had for me – She (the person who offered me the tempting but fake fruits) was lying to me according to her interests and none of what was being offered would truly fulfill me. My modern careerist goals were driven by my ego, my ambitions and not my genuine desire to serve a higher purpose. I’m well aware that many of those in this current career path may be really coming from a place of service and it may true that it’s their calling. However, that doesn’t ring true for me. It’s also true that while I may be doing well in this (and in many other things, too, like most of us) what would serve the greater good is if I consciously choose the manner by which I would want to get better, the manner by which I’d like to contribute in my own way and last but not the least the manner that is the most meaningful to me.

I know from that experience that t’s not easy to go through a similar situation especially if you’re required to make a quick decision. It’s also difficult and scary to say no to what your ego wants in favor of what would feed your spirit. The ego is louder and more demanding and it can fool you into believing that it has your best interests, that it actually knows what is right for you.

But don’t be fooled – following the ego’s desires will lead you to a path of insecurity and confusion. When you’re living from your ego, you will never feel good enough and you will never truly thrive. You will never be joyful and at peace. How do I know these? I tune into my heart and project myself into 2 very different kinds of futures – one where my ego leads me and another, where my spirit does and I live from the inside-out.

The path of my ego is not the path I want to spend my life on. It may lead me to material wealth and successes but I know it’s not the best use of my lifetime. I don’t want to look back at my life in my deathbed and regret not living the life I know I should have –  the life I could have lived.

How about you? What did you do when you were faced with a similar situation? How did you traverse your crossroads and came up with a decision you had to live with?

Self · Tarot Readings · Work

Ace of Cups: Taking a leap of faith

ace of cupsLately, I began asking my higher self and the Universe about my life purpose. I don’t know which happened first – the change in the tides/seasons of my life or my will to face the path that has been calling me and has been preparing me for decades.

But I heard The song. It’s always been in the background of my life – subtle like the wind or birds’ chirping. I never really paid attention ’cause it’s always been there. I started getting more curious. I decided to move closer to it and find its source. I kept my senses open and sharp. I began letting go of everything that would distract me.

I kept on with my dogged search for weeks, then days…until it hit me. The search has led me inside my very own familiar heart. It’s quite surprising for me that I didn’t have to dig that deep to find the gem which was the source of the subtle song.

I realized that some truths may scream at us so loudly that we can’t ignore them, but other truths are so subtle that we need to be in that state of alignment before we can actually notice them. They may be subtle but they are consistent. If you want to know more about them and the messages they are sending you, all you have to do is look back at your life and notice its unwavering presence.

The subtle song was telling me that it’s my life purpose to be a spiritual teacher, and even though I don’t feel qualified to do so it tells me that I am indeed very qualified and ready to officially become one. It’s only up to me to embrace it or let it go.

To cut the story short I eventually said yes after some struggling – and many anxious nights and bus rides. Alright, alright I know, Universe, there are still many discussions to be made. I’m listening. No need to argue or convince me. You know me better than I know myself. I’m saying yes to this and I’m really gonna do it.

To be honest, though, despite resonating with this message all still sounded crazy to me. I couldn’t figure out how for the love of life am I gonna fulfill it. How should I begin? What are the next steps now that I said yes? The Universe kept on telling me that the next steps will be revealed to me one at a time as I take action. It will all make sense to me later when I’m ready to receive the meaning.

As I meditated, the Ace of Cups revealed itself to me. The angels snapped their fingers and got my attention – they said, look at this. Pay close attention to what it stands for in your life. This will clarify all your uncertainties at present.

True enough, I have a close relationship with the Ace of Cups. I know this card very well. It’s alive in my life.

An image flashed into my mind’s eye – the first video call I had with my present partner a couple of years ago. Our story was made in heaven in all aspects. We met overseas and developed our relationship despite the distance and many other differences in life circumstances. But despite all of it we found each other, we took a leap of faith and made it until now. We’ve been so so happy – growing and enjoying life together.

It’s the Ace of Cups’ message to me – that’s how a leap of faith looks like. That’s what happens when an overflowing cup has been offered to you and you dive completely into it with all that you are and all that you have in your heart. This kind of opportunity doesn’t happen frequently – but when it does it’ll change the course of your life.

Embracing the Ace of Cups in your life leads to a life of fulfillment and joy – and this doesn’t refer to a temporary high. The Ace of Cups is offering a life-long bliss. What’s being offered to you, if you choose to accept and nourish it, will stay in your life and help you with your journey to enlightenment.

The angels are right – they are always right! That answer in the form of the Ace of Cups is enough. I know what a leap of faith looks and feels like – and I know, very well, too about all the wonderful surprises that come along with it.

Embracing the path of spiritual work will fulfill me and overhaul my life if I let it. I can’t keep myself from smiling with this thought.  🙂 I wish for you to have the courage and faith to open up yourself to the Ace of Cups, too, when it arrives at your door! Take a leap of faith and dive into its overflowing love and joy that is especially offered to you.

I don’t fully know what’s ahead of me – but I’m getting bits and pieces of what feels right to do next. I’m becoming more curious and faithful now than ever and I’m loving it! I’ll take my time and enjoy the ride as it happens. I’ll make sure to share my insights along the way. I hope you enjoy the ride of your life, too!