Initially I thought that moving forward only meant giving up and walking away on your own, ignoring the situation and asserting your independence. Later on I realized that it’s not really true. Genuine peace of mind can only be achieved once you offer your hand in reconciliation and deciding to start again and move forward from hereon. Usually when we just ignore the situation and walk away, we still bring with us all the baggage of the past. We actually bring it closer to us more than ever. It’s just an illusion that we are setting ourselves free.
If we really want to free ourselves of something from our past, when it involves a relationship with another person that still matters to us now, I think what we should do is to take a deep breath, make that initiative to be the mature one in the relationship, offer your hand to make peace with the past, leave all the heartaches behind and start again in a place of balance and a more mature perspective of things.
Making peace with the past doesn’t mean you forget everything that had happened and that you’re changing your mind about it. Although those can happen, too, what I meant was more about accepting what happened and the fact that the past doesn’t have the power over you anymore so there’s no point in sticking your head into it over and over again.
It’s more about your decision to lay down your arms in defensiveness from the past and giving yourself the peace that you so rightfully deserve. We’re just not aware of it most of the time, but the truth is, by being defensive we are just hurting ourselves the most and nobody else.